Over the past couple of days I’ve felt as though a part of me has been missing. Technically speaking, it kinda has.
My eldest, full of ridonculous amounts of excitement, headed off on her school camp on Monday….. It’s only been two nights but I am totally ready to squeeze her to bits when she gets back this afternoon! It has honestly felt like forever since I saw her cheesey grinning face sparkling like a ball of fairy dust! I am totally and utterly looking forward to having my poppet home in just a few hours!
Last night it showed that part of our tribe was missing. Playing a game of Rummikub (FYI: great game) with just three of us sprawled out on the lounge room floor, it was unusually quieter (mini-Hunbal #1 completely takes after me in the chitty-chatty arena) Funny part was that our youngest Hunbal appeared to sense the disturbance in the force, the absence of a tribe member and so began to hum, sing and literally ramble utter nonsense. Endlessly.
I have to say I was rather impressed at the attempt mini-HunBal #2 made to fill in the noise gap of two people with just one voice. I’d also have to say that we felt it was achieved rather well as eventually both Mr Hunbal and I declared, “Ok nuff now!!”
Whilst excited for the happy camper and also ensuring we took the opportunity to focus solely on our other mini-HunBal, it was really obvious to us that we weren’t completely complete. Although seemingly small, our missing mini plays such a vital role in making our HunBal circle whole. As does our other mini. As does the Mr. As do I.
Making coffee this morning, I pondered as to what my little happy camper might be up to right now. It was in this moment that I had one of those moments. You know, those moments where everything suddenly appears shiny and sparkly and, well, clean? Your thoughts lose their foggy edge, as though the clouds have cleared on them and in that moment, thoughts being ‘thunked’ are totally and utterly crystal clear?
Yeah. One of those.
So, here’s the thing…..
In the living of life, you can absolutely get used to those around you. You begin to operate with a background sense of they’re just there. They’ll ‘always’ be there. “I’ll just do this/I’m just going to/they won’t mind……” phrases like these and others creep in as you begin to do everything else except spend time with those right in front of you. You think that when you’ve done X, Y, Z…….right after you’ve completed A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P………they’ll still be there, just waiting for you to pay them some attention…….
Sometimes, they are.
Sometimes, they’re not.
In my coffee making moment? I actually found myself feeling, “I just don’t want to risk that!” I totally don’t want to risk going through the entire alphabet of things I think I should be doing before I then pay attention to my tribe!
From my precious minis to my scrumptious Mr, I don’t want them living on a, “I love you! You’re amazing!” from three weeks ago. I want them adorned with love and affirmations and care and support and encouragement and hugs and kisses Every. Single. Day. Multiple times. From ME.
I am now constantly on my own back to live a life of no regrets. To therefore become aware at any moment throughout life that I am taking for granted someone that I truly treasure and deeply-love….and then not to change my behaviour? Well that would be one of the biggest regrets of my life!
Yet, thanks to the de-fogging of my mind at the point of making coffee this morning (could’ve been the coffee beans aroma, who knows) it is totally and utterly my life’s desire to ensure This. Doesn’t. Happen.
“Do Something Today That Your Future Self
Will Thank You For”